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Defensiveness is one of Gottman's Four Horsemen of relationship rupture. But it's also a protective mechanism. The question isn't whether you're being defensive. The question is what it's protecting. The answer is usually this: discomfort. Avoidance and projection are two of the most common coping mechanisms in the world. And the reason they're so common is because they work — they take away discomfort in the moment. But they don't heal anything. And they don't connect you. Get curious about whe
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Officially trained on the Gottman Method!! Just wrapped up the Gottman Couple’s Therapy training & took so many notes I couldn’t even type fast enough. Here are 5 lessons I took away from day 2 (plus 10000 more that won’t fit in one video!) 😍 #gottman #gottmantherapy #couple #relationships
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